Exhaustion? Depression? Surrender



Exhaustion? Depression? Surrender?

Which one is causing the effect? Sometimes it is hard to tell if it is one thing or all three things mixing together creating a cocktail that makes it hard to escape. It can produce a Category 5 of emotions, decisions, and actions.

It can feel like a superpower navigating the changes internally and externally. There are days in which the exhaustion cape just doesn’t come off. This is followed by a complete surrender to whatever occurs as a result because all that is sought is the change of what is being felt or dealt with. It is funny because hope is often still very present, just surrounded by the other hardships that are being dealt with.

It is like you’re trying to speak on something that is very important but someone has his or her hand over your mouth. You’re so close, yet so far. It is like clawing for help in the shadows.

Truly, there is nothing that can be said that helps fix the issue but I can cheerlead by saying, “Don’t give up and keep going.” This can be a mirror conversation or a conversation for others who need to hear it as well, usually it is a daily action for both.

You know what, my issue is finances, as we know. As I typed this, the Prince lyrics pop into my mind: “What’s the matter with your life? Is the poverty bringing you down?”

My current flow is surrender to whatever happens which isn’t the best move but the stress and worry and begging feeling just won’t work. It is not pride. It is an entirely different beast that you don’t want to experience.

I think about my $1500 goal that needs to be reached by Wednesday, September 4, 2019… and although I’m prayerful and hopeful, the reality of history creeps in that just makes me want to ignore that the need is present. If you desire to help, I will put a few links at the end of this post.

If you are feeling the same way, I still desire to encourage you. KEEP PUSHING. Don’t give up. This is temporary and I’m praying that as soon as possible this changes for you. Connect with others who also pour into you positively and you pour into them as well. Be authentic and know you are not alone. We all are going through some tough times but these tough times won’t last forever. You got this. KEEP PUSHING. Reach out to me and let us keep each other encouraged.

Links if you desire to donate:

Buy me a coffee https://www.buymeacoffee.com/9CJr5zOBa

PayPal: sistersolstice@gmail.com

Venmo: @enigmaticsoulrg

CashApp: @enigmaticsoulrg


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