Journey to Rebuilding Me

This is a journey that still takes prayer for me. A consistent and continuous building that I pray I get in order this year. It’s amazing how you can love someone so much and sometimes the barrier is him vs himself, not realizing that the gamechanger is already provided but it has to be chosen and accepted. Letting go of someone that has given you joy by being who they are while still being a work in progress is truly a hard, hard action that may never go away. You just learn to cope in the person’s absence and allow God to be that source, as it should have been from the start.

Virgobeautys World

It wasn’t by choice. It was a forced hand… a barrier that I wasn’t able to shift on my own.

Do I feel defeated? Yes. Do I feel wounded? Yes. Do I still love you? Tremendously. Do I feel like so much could have been prevented? Yes.

I was told the thing that fueled me as an athlete and pushed me forward with a drive to conquer and never give up… is the same thing that keeps me trying when I should release and not hold on so long, clinging to hope and the beauty I saw and felt.

It’s that fuel that pushed me and blinded me to the darkness of a battle that I wasn’t equipped to fight.

It’s the fuel that kept me trying to save someone that couldn’t see saving himself.

It’s the fuel of reminders and gratitude that I once needed and gleaned from others…

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5 thoughts on “Journey to Rebuilding Me

  1. It’s so difficult to be with someone, or even try to help someone, that doesn’t want to make that effort… especially when they don’t feel they are in need of help. Sometimes the best thing we can do is love from a distance, because it only hurts us and brings us down with them. I love the strength and the humility you display in your post. The fact that you can admit that it hurts, you love deeply and that you’re HUMAN makes this time in your life much easier to deal with. So many people want to deny that part of them, but that takes courage to do that. Love the message in this post, Virgo. I hope things lift up for you soon, my friend! Happy Rebuilding!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re very welcome, my friend. Keep your head up. Storms don’t last forever… they eventually go away, but they do make you stronger when training you with their harsh winds. ☺️

        Liked by 1 person

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